Gain/Loss Frames
Have you ever experienced the feeling of having someone live rent-free in your head? I have, and it's a journey many have been on. Have you ever considered why these moments happen? We could evict these cognitive squatters, yet we let them stay.
Over time, I have learned to deal with these moments with grace. Research shows that the “frame” through which we view these moments influences how we handle or mishandle cognitive squatters.
We use two basic frames to filter life’s stories: a “gain frame” and a “loss frame.” The gain frame interprets the perceived benefits and gains of any experience, while the loss frame calculates the perceived losses. Both frames impact our motivation to act.
Intuitively, one might suggest living life through a gain frame. While tempting, there are times when calculating the loss is necessary to understand potential risks. However, over-indexing on either can lead to issues.
Viewing life exclusively through a loss frame can put one in a precarious mental state, allowing for emotional hijacking, a term popularized by psychologist Daniel Goleman. It refers to situations where intense emotions override rational thinking, leading to impulsive actions and distorted perceptions. Once in hijacked mode, the loss framing can pull people into a state of victimhood.
Conversely, focusing solely on the gain can leave us vulnerable to unforeseen risks. The key is self-awareness to recognize repeated patterns that may lead to over-indexing. One exercise is to record your top three emotion words each day to notice a trend in the type of emotion consuming your narrative.
When your thoughts skew toward how an individual or group is causing you loss, take a moment to reflect. Ask yourself which emotions are currently consuming your narrative. Then, rethink what you have gained and can control based on the experience. This process gives back your agency, allowing you to reframe the moment. What you do next is less likely from a victim’s perspective and more likely from a position of empowerment.
To regain your agency, identify and label your emotions, challenge negative thoughts by questioning their validity, and set small, achievable goals to regain a sense of control.
If life seems to swirl, reflect on the story you are telling yourself. Rethink the story you want, reframing your mindset. Then act based on your new mindset. If you struggle to rethink, consider seeking help from professional "unpackers" who can assist you.
How we frame our experiences significantly impacts our mental well-being and actions. By consciously choosing to reflect, rethink, and act, we can regain control over our narratives and avoid falling into victimhood. If you struggle with this process, seeking the help of a professional can provide valuable guidance. Remember, the power to evict those cognitive squatters lies within you. Take charge of your mental space and live more mindfully.