A Story in 3 Words to Change the World

“Next to physical survival, the greatest need of a human being is psychological survival; to be understood, to be affirmed, to be validated, to be appreciated.”  Dr. Stephen Covey

Our need for psychological survival can come at a high cost. To be understood requires us to be seen and heard. Our deep desire for affirmation and validation has found a familiar outlet to express our inner journey in a way for others to know our personal and intrapersonal plot-twists in life

We string together words to tell stories for countless reasons, primarily to help us survive psychologically. The bombardment of stories into our minds is nonstop. Written, spoken, or sung, we are encircled by stories.

These stories, crafted from words, help us navigate life’s never-ending plot twists. We use these stories as protection and support for ourselves and others throughout our day.

When used poorly, words can destroy their intended target. When used well, they bring healing to the wounded soul. An ancient proverb says, “The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

In 2019 the number of social media posts, including text messages, sent was a staggering 811,337 per second. By mid-year 2020, those numbers had grown exponentially. In July of 2020, it is estimated there are nearly 4 billion active social media users on the planet. With a few taps on a smartphone, comments are sent into the ether to instantaneously encircle the globe.

In the modern-day war of words, the arsenal of weapons at the fingertips of people today is so abundant there may not be a word to describe the destructive power available to the masses. Jonathan Swift wrote in 1710, “Falsehood flies, and the truth comes limping after it.” I can only wonder what Swift would have thought about the speed of words 300 years later.

To quote Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben, who borrowed these words from Voltaire, “With great power comes great responsibility.” Still, each day, we seem to level up our gamesmanship of destroying our neighbor with our words.

The English language has over 170,000 words; however, we typically use about 5,000 when we speak (anecdotally, it seems this number has been reduced to a few four-letter, mostly vulgar words) and roughly double that in our writing. Is it just me, or could the world benefit from the healing balm of a few sincere words intended to promote our psychological survival?

When used with sincerity, three modest words tell a story that has the power to bring change and healing. They are not the only words that bring healing, but they are a place to begin. Telling this powerful story, using these three humble words opens a treasury of additional words to promote change, healing, and engagement.

To quote Dr. Bernadine Healy, a pioneer at the National Institutes of Health, who had a sign on her desk which read, “Strong Verbs, Short Sentences.” I could not agree more when it comes to these powerful three words.

The three words…I appreciate you.

Is it too bold to say we are in desperate need of expressing our genuine appreciation for those around us? Just imagine if we began our day, on purpose, driven by a sincere curiosity to find out what we truly appreciate about others. Just imagine the tapestry of wonders we would discover in the uniqueness of those around us.

In his new book, The 5 Languages of Appreciation, Dr. Gary Chapman writes there are five ways to show others' appreciation. If they sound familiar, they should;

Words of affirmation, while a text message is meaningful, sometimes a handwritten card is powerful.

Acts of service, doing something for others expecting nothing in return.

Quality time, spending moments listening, and being sincerely curious.

Gifts, who doesn't appreciate a gift card to their favorite place to eat.

Physical touch, keep in mind this one is reserved for those we are in a close relationship with.

Just imagine if you started here, how these simple words could take you to new destinations of being understood, validated, affirmed, and appreciated. The possibilities are endless. What may surprise you is the most significant impact which will occur…may be with you.

Onward!